Friday, January 25, 2008

CHOICES

I was watching a movie today...Manorama 6 feet under. A convoluted plot, with an air of impending doom over the whole two and a half hours I spent watching the flick. There was one thing which struck a strong chord in me and which prompted me to write here.
The whole movie was dominated by one thing which was pretty overwhelming. people make decisions ,strong decisions only when they are faced with tough choices. till then they wait till they are cornered.

Isn't that a similar thing which dominates all the choices we make. make decisions when we are challenged by something more alien and stronger than us? Or make a decision under duress or when coerced into a situation we wish we were never into.
I have many decisions in my life attributed to this same helpless feeling of being manipulated by forces stronger than me. And it is at such times I feel that the decision taken couldn't be otherwise. that that was the ultimate decision to be taken. But that is not the whole truth. our choices are own. Only we don't have the strength or sometimes integrity to take them when we should. Waiting for the “correct” moment often takes the decision out of our hands. one must be a ,master of their own destiny...

something I heard form an old friend...a person who didn't believe in the existence of God and said our choices are our own and the responsibilities which come with it. and yet in that knowledge he wasn't perfect. Because even though we know of this great truth...how many of us follow it and believe it.how many of us wait for divine intervention and how many of us feel that “its gods will”.

I am a devout believer. make no mistake! I would never for any reason negate his presence in my life. infact I only have Him in my life thats correct and so comforting. its His presence that will lead me guide me and love me like no one else could ever hope to or could possibly.

I only regret my inability to make those choices when its my turn to move the pieces. someday I will learn how to do it.the day when I shall stop thinking of the future and of consequences and stuff that makes my life fuzzy.all those little pieces which float about and deflect me from my main mission. one day I will learn.to let go and love with a love which needs no reciprocation. That will be the day I can take those tiny decisions before they are made for me. MY CHOICE.

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