SHADES OF GREY

SHADES OF GREY...

I find it in myself to marvel at the wonders of the world, its dynamism and continual state of flux. Things I thought that could never change are juxtaposed with others daily. Seamier things suddenly exalted to new highs, while those I thought constant as the stars no longer the same. Brings a feeling of unpredictability in my life. Being a typically restless person I crave activity and newness in all I see around d me. yet at most times still hoe things that matter the most to me never ever change…like a safe haven to crawl back into when the going gets not tough but excruciatingly UNBEARABLE.im no coward but have my moments of flagging spirits, and at such times wish I get some respite from everything. some place to run to and hide and lick my wounds or at best recharge my batteries and get going again.
Today I was betrayed yet again by something I never thought would betray me. a person I thought who couldn’t ever change ,no matter what, a person as steady as a rock on the mountainside ,no landslide could uproot turned out to have feet of clay. Yet again I’m disappointed yet again betrayed. Seems I’m going to have cycles of betrayal in my life. and their occurrence have become boringly recurrent. What am I to do? Well nothing just take stock of things and walk on as I usually do. The only thing that changes is the degree of bitterness in my heart. The colors deepen and the emotions get congealed yet again…
Alas the ironies of life…look for the most precious things and find that they actually don’t exist…and now it doesn’t matter any more…just a clean break to make and ill be back under control …yet again…walking living loving hating and doing all those things human consider so so important…are they??