CONFUSION

I am so beginning to believe that we sometimes are a product of not only our environment and our genes but sometimes the environment which we may have lived in sometime and long forgotten it. Yes I am talking about rebirth. to be honest with you guys I never really believed in this concept and like a devout Christian always believed in the after life……a life after death or heaven and earth and us being a part of eternity united in the body and blood of Jesus.
I still do but I also find it difficult to find explanations for affiliations and feelings like deja - vu’s which I have never before had or maybe had but never really realized or recognized.

This might sound weird coming form a sane adult female who is educated and lives in the present times. But it’s for sure there is something that ticks me off………sometimes a particular smell….and environment or maybe just a food. It’s like my old rusty memory kicks in and I feel like I have done this almost a zillion times …and to be honest takes away the novelty of the act. I suddenly feel at ease in situations I have never been before or never known how to handle. But here I am reveling in such a situation with not a clue of how it is going to turn out.
Maybe, I’m just a nut case. But that’s all the explanation I have for this and probably an argument that even nut cases have saner moments.

There is another part too. The sense of belonging I was endowed with as being born and part of a family is long gone. Strange I just realized this and have seen over a few years that I have no home except one …strange place I’ve never been. It’s simple really if you look at it, there is a home inside each one of us which we go to and which only we can trust. Some place which is my own and one which no one can break into and breech. A place of my own at last, so close and I never realized it that I had it.

But loneliness is a killer especially when you taste it. And the loneliness without your own sanctum is the mother of them all. So go and find that sacred inner sanctum virgin as no beech in this world can be……clean and pristine……….your own private beech in the island of life: D its holiday time folks…find your favorite destination.